So my question is: when's the right time to push forward, get assertive, follow your dream to the very hilt. And when's the time to just notice, sit back, let it all wash over you like a warm summer breeze that tickles your hair?
I have something very specific in mind, as you might guess. For a few days, I'm staying at a small retreat center north of San Diego. Although I do have appointments in San Diego (Solana Beach, actually), I decided NOT to waste five days away from office and home, but instead to spend that time wisely. Writing. So I created a mini-writing retreat for myself. Good for me, right?
Exceptionally good for me. Except for one thing. I fell in love with the place. It's everything I've ever wanted in a Garden Retreat Center, my vision for My Work here on Earth. It has organic gardens, housing for 20 people, orchards, rocky paths, a house with a pool and hot tub, pools, fountains, even goat pens.
But it's in San Diego, my husband reminds me. The unspoken end of the sentence is: "and we live in North Carolina." He's right. His job is here, his retirement is only a few years away. And we don't have $1.5 million in the bank to save this charming retreat center from the clutches of development. That should put an end to my speculation. Right?
Well, maybe not. I have frenzied imaginings of pulling together investors, drafting a quick proposal, energizing my business plan and making a valiant effort to get financing. Nothing is impossible, after all.
So how deep is this dream? How serious am I about throwing everything into disarray? Would I really move to California? I flirt with the idea of living bi-coastally, a commuter marriage. Do things like this come into my life to tantalize me, make me wake up to the possible -- the passionate possibility? And after the teaser, I am to close my eyes and let that summer breeze whisper: let it go, let it go, let it go.
There is something important in this experience. I didn't choose this retreat center at this time by accident; I don't believe in coincidences any more. I trust that everything comes into my life with purpose and possibility. I just need to practice patience until that message comes in more clearly,
Let it flow, let it flow, let it flow.
About Me
- Linda Roggli
- "Never a dull moment." That's what they'll write on my tombstone, when I leave this plane and transition to the next. Why be bored? Or boring? Makes no sense to me when life is so full of interesting, exotic and exhilarating experiences. I've written a book, been scuba diving, flown an airplane, eaten way too much frozen custard on occasion, reveled in the smell of newly-mown grass, lost a beloved pet, sweated on the elliptical, listened to my own coaching sessions without cringing, went through labor a second time, learned to say "I love you" to my dad, visited the ruins of ancient Rome, lightly brushed treetops in a hot air balloon, loved and lost and loved again, was on-camera for a story about a truckload of honey bees that overturned enroute to Florida, taken the GMAT and LSAT and GRE but never went to grad school, been thin then chubby then thin, looked high and low for the Real Me and finally found her right here all the time. Now you know all about ME. Tell me about YOU. Leave comments on this blog by clicking the "comments" link. Or not. I'll still love you even if you just lurk, read and leave. Oh, I forgot to mention: I give a LOT of hugs. Ask anyone.